Tag Archives: parents

Parents Need to be Parents

Dear Reader,

The idea of becoming a mother terrifies me.  There’s a huge amount of responsibility that comes with children, but also the unconditional love of a person you made.  It’s something that in years to come, I hope to experience – but not today, this year or next.  I’m not ready for that.  I can take care of a pet just fine, but I have serious reservations when it comes to a little person.  Plus its not something I want to do alone.  That’s getting into a whole other topic.  Let’s refocus!

Last night I went on a brief shopping trip to Target.  I needed a belt and since I was there I couldn’t pass up looking around.  It’s friggen Target people!  I grab a bunch of stuff and go to the dressing room.  There was an adorable little girl, probably 2 or 3 years old.  Keep in mind my ability to gauge children’s ages is really bad, all I know was that she was little and clearly not potty trained well enough.  She was out playing by the attendant.  No parent in sight.  I was concerned but since the attendant was smiling and acknowledging the child I decided to mind my own business.

Unknowingly I picked the dressing room next to the child’s mother, who had at least one other friend in the dressing room with her.  I don’t like to make judgements of people, but I wasn’t impressed with these individuals.  A few minutes go by and the child comes into the dressing area, bangs on the door until her mother opens the door for her and proceeds to announce that she must pee.  Mother and friend laugh about this.  Child states again that she must pee – now and that she will pee in her pants.  Mother continues to ignore this.

I thought this was irresponsible, but of course every rational parent will take care of their child.

Or so I thought.

The next thing I hear is the unmistakable sound of peeing, liquid splattering on that thin carpet covering concrete that’s just rough concrete.

I froze and thought that I had to be hearing things and waited – but no – the kid really was peeing.

The mother and friend laughed and giggled and never once reprimanded the child.  They even stated that they were going to sneak out of the dressing room without telling the attendant.

I was pissed.  That child needs a mother who is a mom.  Just because you’re a teenage/early 20’s mom doesn’t mean that you have an excuse to be a bad parent.  Sure you get some leniency but letting your child pee in a dressing room?  That’s unacceptable.  Also, it’s gross.  Bad parenting creates problems for children.  My parents were of the school that crying was not allowed.  They weren’t emotionally extroverted parents.  I have issues with communicating my feelings.  But at least my parents taught me responsibility.  I can get over my emotional constipation on my own.  Do the world a favor, if you have kids, be a parent.  That’s what they need.* for the record, I did tell the attendant what had happened so she could at least call someone in to clean it up

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House Hunting is Exhausting

Dear Reader,

I already want to be done with the house shopping.  It’s exhausting.  But more than that, I very much want to be out of my apartment soon.  When I moved into the complex I live in there hadn’t been any arrests on the premesis, there was security, and a gate.  Today none of that is true.  On my way out this morning I passed a guy from the building across the parking lot being arrested.  I want out of this apartment and since the plan is to get a house – I want to get a house, now.

I’ve picked one out.  I love it.  My parents hate it.  No, they won’t be living there but they are giving me the downpayment for the house and taking care of closing costs so their oppinion does matter.  So we’re looking again.  To date we’ve looked at around 20 houses and have about 15 more ear marked to look at.

While looking I’ve been shocked at how trashed many of the houses are.  Funny odors, carpet I’m scared to walk on, walls I won’t dare touch and unknown stuff smeared on walls or the ceiling.  Some of the houses I’ve wondered if I would leave alive.  And then there are others that are very nice. Those are usually out of my price range and priced below what they’re worth, which is still a little more than I can afford.

The issue I’m having is my parents think I can get something that is in good repair, nice quality and acceptable location for about $70,000 – because that’s what my grandmother got about four or five years ago.  They refuse to understand that the market where my grandmother moved is different.  That I’m looking at houses that are newer and the economy has changed.

Last night my mother went shopping with us.  I’m not sure if she grasped what it is we’re looking at or if she understood it all better.  Here’s hoping she did, because we have 11 houses to look at tonight and the idea exhausts me.

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